Forget moon, our generation is more interested in finding life on social media, probably because spending time there is relatively easier than stepping out into the real world and live. One of the major reasons why people prefer Facebook over real world is, because nobody can come out of your computer screen and slap you for your stupidity. In earlier days, basic survival needs for a human were oxygen, food, water, sleep and shelter, but now, for us evolved humans, “attention” has made it to the list replacing “sleep”.
Let us have a look at the things people do on Facebook to secure the fourth most important element for survival:-
Bff’s Birthday Collages With Never-ending Captions
“Such a lovely update – it took me 3 days to read till the end. The entire Facebook, the entire humanity wants to thank your friend for taking birth!”
Tagging Everyone In Their pictures because “Likes” Matter
“89 others were right there in the picture but you cropped them out of the picture, right?”
Posting Pictures Of Everything They Eat
“You eat food? How unusual!”
Checking-in To Every Place They Go
“Thanks for the daily check-ins. But there’s no washroom check-in, which suggests you never pee.”
Uploading 3782 Pictures in “Bhaiyya Ki Shadi” Album
“Great album, dude! But where’s the picture of tyre of the car bride arrived in?”
Sending Candy Crush Requests Repeatedly Shamelessly
“Someday I’ll definitely accept your invitation to play Candy Crush… someday after I bury you in my backyard.”
I Love Pizza. I Love Eminem. And Whatever’s cool.
“It breaks my heart to see #DieHardEminemFans only listening to Himesh and #DieHardPizzaJunkies only eating dal roti when they’re out of the virtual world.”
Using FB apps like “Which Celeb You Look Like”
“You have absolutely no reason to look like a celebrity unless either of your parents ever dated a celebrity.”
Relatives Trying To Chat In Comment Section
“Hey uncle, how about you ask about how lesser I’m earning than your son when you come home, leaving this comment section alone?
Spreading Sadness Via Status Updates
“Your depressing status updates make me feel better about my life. Keep it up!”
Trying To Sound Mature By Talking About Things They Know Nothing About
“Woah! I have never met a person so knowledgable, intellectual and experienced like you are at an age of 12.”
Like My Status And I’ll Blah Blah Yada Yada
“LMS and I’ll post my views about each one of you, because quite honestly, nobody in my entire life so far has asked me to grow up.”
“Update when you propose her. Update when she cries. Update when he shares half of his burger with you. Post your love letters. Your love story is my favourite web series.”
This list should’ve been longer? Yes, absolutely.